So as some of you may (or may not) have noticed, I have been missing from the blog for a little while. I have needed to take a little bit of time out to get myself feeling more positive. I have posted before about how hard that can be for me here.

I have taken a bit of time off work on the advice of my doctor and am slowly starting to feel a bit more human. Getting upset constantly and crying so much I can’t breathe at some points, had to stop so I finally accepted I needed some space. I can’t keep pretending I’m ok when I’m not.

I have tried to write posts a few times while I have been off but I’ve found it really difficult to write when all I want to do is pull the duvet over my head and hide from the world. This video is a good example of how it feels sometimes. However, I have to remember that a big part of this blog was to connect with people and giver an outlet even when I wasn’t feeling like it in the ‘real world’.

I have started yoga and using some meditation breathing exercises in the hope that a bit of relaxation will help me feel much better but a bit of breathing and stretching can’t fix my problems over night. I think my main issue is I know what I want in life but struggle with the motivation to do it, then get upset that I haven’t done it! I am also struggling with some things that seem out of control at the moment but I’m not going to let my issues rule my life. Instead I’m going to stop over thinking and start doing!

I have picked up my phone to try and write an update so many times since my last post and found I’ve put my phone down, put my head on a pillow and closed my eyes. After a tricky couple of days at work I’ve been reflecting on mood and how it affects life.

I can go from a beaming smile to crying on someone’s shoulder in minutes these days and I can’t put my finger on why! I have tried to smile through it, eyes and teeth as a colleague says, but I sometimes just feel… sad!

Don’t get me wrong I don’t have a horrible life, far from it actually as I love my family and I am lucky to have trained in a rewarding career that gives me enough money to buy lots of beauty products 😄 However holding on to that when the pressures of life build is difficult at times.

I met a very good friend of mine on Tuesday (over a yummy Nandos 🍗) and we got chatting about meditation. After I got home (and opened the button on my jeans to release my belly stuffed with a well cooked food baby), I looked up some mediation techniques online and I guess I can see how it would help so although I am a little sceptical I have decided to give it a go. Make sure you keep checking in as alongside my beauty posts I’ll update on how meditation is going.

Before you go and read another blog don’t forget to leave your comments below 😊 Does anyone else feel down even when life is good? How do you cope through the stresses of life and get the best out of yourself? Has meditation worked for you?